Why “Show, Don’t Tell” Is Ruining Your Writing (And the Voice Formula That Actually Works)
I’d argue that the most common writing advice, “Show, Don't Tell,” is often the most useless. It’s at least the most misunderstood writing rule.
This advice started with a letter from Anton Chekhov to his brother where he famously wrote, “Don’t tell me the moon is shining, show me the glint of light on broken glass.”
At the time, this was revolutionary. Literature was emerging from a very yappy Victorian era where narrators would spend ten pages explaining a character’s moral compass. Chekhov wanted to ground the reader in the physical world.
Writing instructors (myself included!) took this statement, chopped it up, and then stripped it into a rule that we don’t do a very good job of explaining.
Usually, we overly simplify it by presenting it as a simple swap:
TELLING: A flat statement like, “He said, angrily,” or “The room was messy.”
SHOWING: An overly flowery sentence that describes physical objects or the room or whatever.
The problem? This leads to empty camera-work where a protagonist becomes a passive observer instead of a narrator with a perspective. If we want to write a compelling novel, we have to stop describing objects and start filtering them through the narrator’s voice.
We don’t want to use flowery language just to avoid telling. In fact, telling isn’t bad! It’s necessary! But we’re not going to go into that today. Keep reading to how to use the Voice Formula (Object + Emotion = Opinion) to fix the “Show, Don't Tell” trap and write descriptions with actual personality.
Why "Show, Don't Tell" Is Ruining Your Writing (And the Voice Formula That Actually Works)
The Problem with Traditional “Showing” Advice
It’s time to throw out old “showing” advice like this:
TELLING: The room was messy.
SHOWING: Stacks of dusty books leaned precariously against a pile of crumpled laundry.
Okay? Coolio? So what?
This type of simplified “show, don’t tell” advice turns our very cool protagonist into a passive observer rather than a narrator with a perspective. Boo. :(
DON’T: Describe something just to avoid an empty room.
DO: Use description to show how the character feels.
What we need to do instead:
Filter every detail through your narrator’s perspective. If your “showing” doesn't have an opinion, it’s just filler.
To do this, you have to define your goal. Before you write a single sensory detail, ask yourself:
> The Goal: What is this object’s purpose in the story? What is it revealing to the reader?
> The Emotion: What is my narrator’s current state of mind?
The Secret Formula:
(Object) + (Narrator's Emotion) = The Narrator’s Opinion
Emotion is the catalyst and opinion is how that emotion manifests on the page.
OBJECT: In our example, this is books and laundry
+
EMOTION: What the narrator is feeling
=
OPINION: How they perceive the object because of that feeling
When you add Emotion to the Object, you get a Specific Point of View. A Distinct Voice!
Let’s See This in Action:
THE ANNOYED NARRATOR
The room had finally surrendered to the clutter. Stacks of books loomed like tombstones over a graveyard of sour-smelling laundry that hadn't seen a washing machine in weeks.
> Now the mess is a failure.
THE LOVING NARRATOR
It was a beautiful, chaotic map of her mind. I loved how her books never stayed on the shelves and how her favorite sweaters always ended up in a soft, colorful heap on the floor.
> Now the mess is a personality.
THE DISGUSTED NARRATOR
A film of grime had claimed the books, and the laundry sat in a damp, sour-smelling heap that resembled rotting compost. Every step was a gamble against a crusty sock or a hidden puddle of mystery juice.
> Now the mess is a biohazard.
THE OVERWHELMED NARRATOR
The clutter was closing in. Every leaning tower of books felt like a ticking clock, and the mountain of laundry was just one more "to-do" she didn't have the hands to finish.
> Now the mess is a breaking point.
THE GRIEVING NARRATOR
Evidence of his absence was everywhere. Dust had settled in thick, gray blankets over the books he’d never finish, and the laundry stayed crumpled on the chair, still holding the shape of someone who wasn't there.
> Now the mess is a ghost.
See how the same pile of books and laundry becomes five completely different scenes? The objects didn't change, but the narrator's emotional lens did. This is what real ‘showing’ looks like. :)
Reminders:
Your “Meaning” has to Match Your Genre + Age Category
The next time you’re writing description, consider the following:
> How does my character feel about this? Are they… happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time?
> What is the meaning behind this detail? What does our narrator think?
> Does this fit my genre and voice? The language we use in a rom-com is going to be very different from a horror.
When I say “age category,” I mean your target audience. A middle-grade narrator won't process that messy room the same way an adult literary fiction narrator would. Kids notice different things, use different language, and have different emotional priorities.
2. All Craft Elements Affect Each Other
We can’t talk about showing + telling without talking about pacing. Pacing is how fast or slow information reaches your reader.
Showing = Slower pacing (takes more words/time to convey info)
Telling = Faster pacing (gets info across quickly)
The Real Estate Principle: What gets more real estate (words/space) = What matters more to your story
If you spend 200 words describing a coffee cup through your narrator's emotional lens, readers assume that coffee cup is IMPORTANT. If it's just a throwaway prop, you've misled them.
When to Show vs Tell
SHOW (slow down for):
Emotional turning points
Key character revelations
Important setting details that affect plot
Moments you want readers to “live through”
TELL (speed past):
Transitions between scenes
Background info dumps
Unimportant but necessary details
Stuff that happened “off camera”
For example:
TOO MUCH SHOWING: The doorknob felt cold beneath her trembling fingers, its brass surface reflecting her terrified face in tiny, distorted fragments... (Unless this door is CRUCIAL, this is way too much real estate)
BALANCED: "She grabbed the doorknob and ran. (Sometimes a door is just a door)
“Show, don't tell” was never about avoiding all telling! It was intended to make your prose come alive through perspective. When you filter every detail through your narrator's emotional lens, you're revealing character, advancing plot, and creating the kind of immersive experience that keeps readers glued to the page.
The real magic happens when readers forget they're reading descriptions at all. Instead, they're experiencing the world through your character's eyes, feeling what they feel, seeing what matters to them. Because without emotion and opinion driving your descriptions, you're not showing anything. You're just pointing a very boring camera at very pretty objects.
Your narrator is a human being (or an anthropomorphic cat or robot or toaster) with feelings, biases, and a unique way of seeing the world. Let that messy, beautiful humanity spill onto every page.
Tiffany Grimes (she/they) is the founder of Burgeon Design and Editorial, a queer founded boutique editing and design house for brave creatives. At Burgeon, we specialize in book editing, coaching, and web design for the individualists, nonconformists, and trailblazers of the literary world. If you’re a maverick, outsider, rebel, renegade, dissenter, disruptor, or free spirit, you’ve come to the right place.
